toughLOVE

Saturday, 13 September 2003

After much deliberation, I've decided to turn this blog into just a normal website. I might change it back, but for now, it's a site.

It's been a really long time since my first entry. I got busy during the summer and then school started, so I've just been putting this site off ever since then. My bad. Anywho, well, I'm putting another long entry off even further b/c I've got some stuff to do around my apartment. Keep checking back though, I'll have a brand spanking new entry up very soon.

Wednesday, 25 June 2003

In the beginning...
In the beginning there was a tv show. In the beginning there was me, a fan, who watched this show occasionally, liking what I saw, but never getting emotionally involved in it. In the beginning there was innosence.

In the beginning there was a television show called Buffy the Vampire Slayer. I watched this show every now and then, entranced by it actually. I taped the episodes, bought a calendar, and even cried at the end of "The Gift." But I wasn't ever emotionally involved. I was just a fan.

All that changed when I became a shipper.

In the beginning I saw a blonde girl catch the eye of a redhead on "Buffy". It was during an episode much hyped and much anticipated. Having just begun watching Buffy, this episode amazed and thrust me into fandom of the show. The idea of "Hush" - the episode in silence - was enough to perk any tv watcher's curiosity. The blonde girl in this episode (Tara) became my favorite character, although I didn't realize it for 2 years. How was it that I was a shipper of Willow and Tara without even realizing it? It took their breakup to make me realize how much I was invested in them, and Tara's song (during the musical, which I saw after "Tabula Rasa") was the beginning the my immense love and dedication for this couple.

That being said, this couple - as well as this tv show in general - has caused me emotions I never expected a tv show to inspire in me. Any fan of Buffy will agree that the one thing this show does in spades is cause fans to think. Episodes are heavily scrutinized, character developments are taken to heart, and being a shipper is never taken lightly. Being a shipper of Willow and Tara has caused me unbelievable happiness, and unbearable pain. Tara's death wasn't just the surprise of "Seeing Red" - it was truly the end of an era for many fans such as myself. It caused hope to shatter, faith to disappear, and betrayal to become very real. Do I feel betrayed by Joss? Yes. I once put this man on a pedestal and wished to one day emulate him in my own writing. Then I hated him. I actually had hatred for a man I once admired.

I don't hate Joss anymore. I can't hate him because despite his ridiculous choice to kill off Tara (and keep her dead which was even more stupid than killing her off in the first place) he did, after all, give me the couple the begin with. I can't hate him because Willow and Tara have given me so much. All the pain and heartbreak that Tara's death caused me was worth it in comparison to the happiness that they gave me, and continue to inspire within me. I love Willow and Tara. It took me a year to realize that they belong in my heart, and it took me another 5 months to stop mourning. It wasn't until the final episode of Buffy in season seven that I decided to put a stop to my mourning. I'll never fully get over Tara's death, but I am done mourning it. I want to celebrate the couple, rewatch the episodes they're in over and over, savor every kiss, every touch, every everything about the couple. Willow and Tara are the most romantic couple ever on television and I feel proud to be a shipper of them.

And so begins this blog - approprietely titled "Tough Love" after one of the episodes of Buffy - it is a collective of thoughts from my brain regarding Buffy TVS, with heavy emphasis on Willow & Tara. In the beginning there was a little glance across the room shared between a blonde and a redhead. It's amazing what that little glance started.


Saturday, 13 September 2003 After much deliberation, I've decided to turn this blog into just a normal website. I might change it back, but for now, it's a site. It's been a really long time since my first entry. I got busy during the summer and then school started, so I've just been putting this site off ever since then. My bad. Anywho, well, I'm putting another long entry off even further b/c I've got some stuff to do around my apartment. Keep checking back though, I'll have a brand spanking new entry up very soon. Wednesday, 25 June 2003 In the beginning... In the beginning there was a tv show. In the beginning there was me, a fan, who watched this show occasionally, liking what I saw, but never getting emotionally involved in it. In the beginning there was innosence. In the beginning there was a television show called Buffy the Vampire Slayer. I watched this show every now and then, entranced by it actually. I taped the episodes, bought a calendar, and even cried at the end of "The Gift." But I wasn't ever emotionally involved. I was just a fan. All that changed when I became a shipper. In the beginning I saw a blonde girl catch the eye of a redhead on "Buffy". It was during an episode much hyped and much anticipated. Having just begun watching Buffy, this episode amazed and thrust me into fandom of the show. The idea of "Hush" - the episode in silence - was enough to perk any tv watcher's curiosity. The blonde girl in this episode (Tara) became my favorite character, although I didn't realize it for 2 years. How was it that I was a shipper of Willow and Tara without even realizing it? It took their breakup to make me realize how much I was invested in them, and Tara's song (during the musical, which I saw after "Tabula Rasa") was the beginning the my immense love and dedication for this couple. That being said, this couple - as well as this tv show in general - has caused me emotions I never expected a tv show to inspire in me. Any fan of Buffy will agree that the one thing this show does in spades is cause fans to think. Episodes are heavily scrutinized, character developments are taken to heart, and being a shipper is never taken lightly. Being a shipper of Willow and Tara has caused me unbelievable happiness, and unbearable pain. Tara's death wasn't just the surprise of "Seeing Red" - it was truly the end of an era for many fans such as myself. It caused hope to shatter, faith to disappear, and betrayal to become very real. Do I feel betrayed by Joss? Yes. I once put this man on a pedestal and wished to one day emulate him in my own writing. Then I hated him. I actually had hatred for a man I once admired. I don't hate Joss anymore. I can't hate him because despite his ridiculous choice to kill off Tara (and keep her dead which was even more stupid than killing her off in the first place) he did, after all, give me the couple the begin with. I can't hate him because Willow and Tara have given me so much. All the pain and heartbreak that Tara's death caused me was worth it in comparison to the happiness that they gave me, and continue to inspire within me. I love Willow and Tara. It took me a year to realize that they belong in my heart, and it took me another 5 months to stop mourning. It wasn't until the final episode of Buffy in season seven that I decided to put a stop to my mourning. I'll never fully get over Tara's death, but I am done mourning it. I want to celebrate the couple, rewatch the episodes they're in over and over, savor every kiss, every touch, every everything about the couple. Willow and Tara are the most romantic couple ever on television and I feel proud to be a shipper of them. And so begins this blog - approprietely titled "Tough Love" after one of the episodes of Buffy - it is a collective of thoughts from my brain regarding Buffy TVS, with heavy emphasis on Willow & Tara. In the beginning there was a little glance across the room shared between a blonde and a redhead. It's amazing what that little glance started.